Tuesday, April 19, 2011

The Prodigal Sun Returns

I would like to welcome back an old friend.

Yes, after being away for the last seven months, my sunbeam has returned.

Oh, how I have missed it.

For some as yet unexplained reason, my sunbeam disappears in September, and then refuses to return until April or May. This truly annoys me.

I suspect it migrates south for the winter.

But all is well now. I woke up yesterday and spotted it sitting in my bay window, acting very aloof, as though it had never abandoned me. Silently, so as to not alert the other felines, I stalked the sunbeam. I was extremely careful not to spook it because sunbeams in my neck of the woods are extraordinarily skittish and tend to flee if caution is not exercised.

I crept in a low crouch, senses on high alert for the approach of Ivan and Tiger Lily lest they attempt to claim the prey for themselves. Once I deemed myself within pouncing range, I leapt, landing full straddle upon the unsuspecting ray, pinning it to the sill, totally at my mercy.

Satisfied that the beam was subdued, I began my ritualistic sunbeam yoga. Sunbeam yoga is an ancient feline form of exercise that consists of several very difficult pose thingies. I have, of course, mastered them all. Allow me to describe just a few of these:

Sprawled Dead Mousie- One lays on their back, chin jutting and legs parallel to the windowsill.

Creepy Pretzel- Once again, laying prone, but with legs akimbo, one paw wrapped around the head, eyes closed and teeth bared.

Crackhead Sphinx- Sitting on ones brisket, forepaws tucked, wild manic look while chittering. This pose thingy is especially good for watching bird thingies.

Joy To The Swirled- Laying on one's side, forming a perfect circle, connecting nose to tail.

There are many more pose thingies, but they all have one common denominator: If performed by a master such as myself, they can lead to total relaxation and productive napping.

Now, I am afraid that I must return to my bay window to continue my routine before Ivan wakes up and harshes my mellow.


  1. I really love you, Cujo Cat!!! You truly bring JOY to my swirled!!! (SHhhhhh, don't tell)

  2. You have SUN???? Could you please tell it to come visit us? We are on day 3 of much bad rain and we are tired of it....

  3. Off to attempt the Crackhead Sphinx and attain nirvana.

  4. I'm so glad your sunbeam came back!