Monday, August 2, 2010

Possession

The two legger belonging to Moo wrote to me and asked why she is occasionally evicted from bed. This is simple. If Moo has ever touched the bed in question, it now belongs to them.
Here is how the laws of possession work. If a feline four legger touches something, it belongs to them. I will occasionally touch something that doesn't even interest me. It is still mine and it may interest me later. If I ignore something, it simply means that I have deemed it beneath me and therefore not worthy of my attention. I still maintain the right to return and touch it later thereby making it mine, but in the meantime, you may use it as you will.
Beds by definition are automatically considered feline possessions. We allow two leggers to utilize them at our sufferance. This being said, we may evict you at any time for any reason. This is called "repossession" and may be implemented at our discretion. We may allow you to lay with us if we deem there is enough space for a full stretch, but don't count on it. ( we can increase our bodily length by up to 168%)
Any and all new packages being brought into our habitat will automatically be inspected. All empty boxes and bags will be considered ours and must be left on the floor for our entertainment. If any catnip is discovered during our inspection, the catnip will be immediately confiscated and properly disposed of.
Once again I hope I have enlightened and educated my readers. The two leggers may not agree with the laws of possession, but they still have to respect them. It is our duty as feline four leggers to both enforce these laws and punish the shoes of those who choose to break them.

2 comments:

  1. So true! I usually have 3 cats on me when I'm in bed. Makes it hard to get comfy!

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  2. In that case, I guess my wheelchair is considered to be Razzs chair.

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