Today was my birthday.
As my reign of terror and enlightenment enters its' fourth year, I would like to thank all the minions who sent me birthday greetings and gifts. They were greatly appreciated and immensely amusing.
For those who did not send me offerings and presents, I assure you that I understand you have lives of your own and may have been too busy to take the time required to honor me. You may have job thingies, or you may have been ill or infirm, you may have even suffered from a bout of temporary insanity.
Perhaps your internet computer thingy was acting stoopid and you were unable to connect.
Maybe a squirrel thingy climbed the power pole outside your home and in a desperate bid to thwart me, cut the electricity to your house and died a crispy, sizzling death in the process.
It is quite possible that your computer caught one of those virus thingies that auto-erase all good tidings that are sent to feline blog thingies.
Or could it simply be that Homeland Security has confiscated your hard drive........again?
I am nothing if not benevolent.
I don't forgive you, but I understand.